Reviewer: eggman - See all my reviews
I have been grilling and bbq'ing for over 3 years now. I have won my cul-de-sack grandmaster grilling championship for the past 3 years running and, as the cul-de-sack representative, have placed in the top 20, out of 25 mind you, of our annual neighborhood cookoff the past 3 years as well.

I know barbequinq. I know smokeing. I know grilling.

This Weber grill is trash.

First off, it comes ... UNASSEMBLED!

For $300.00 I expect to receive a grill ready to go, straight out of the box. Bolts, Screws, Grates, Holes? I don't have time for any of that. I have to marinade my meat to be ready for prime time smokeing. I expect a grill to be ready out of the box. I don't have 8 (yes it took me eihgt) hours to put this thing together. That is a full workday. Nonsense. If I have to put it together, then it should be a heck of a lot cheaper.

Second, after I put it together I have absolutly no charcoal to cook with. Evidently the geniuses at Weber have figured out a way to cook without charcoal! I just wish they could have put these instructions for cooking without charcoal in the manual as I (along with everyone else I have asked) don't know how you cook without charcoal. Again, for the price I paid it should come with the charcoal. I went back to the home improvement store that I purchased the grill from and they insisted that it does not come with charcoal. RIPOFF!!!

Rather than argue with the employee I go ahead and buy some charcoal for the grill. He recommends some kind of fancy hardwood charcoal. I get it. I put some in the grill. I light the grill and it looks like a fire is going good. Okay, maybe despite the rough start the grill will work out. Well I have news for you. IT DOES NOT WORK!!!

I go ahead and put the Turkey on that I am planning to cook. After little more than two hours I go to check on how it is cooking. THE FIRE IS OUT! I have no idea for how long my turkey has been sitting over no heat. I just know that I am way behind now in serving dinner for my family. I go ahead and fill the grill up with charcoal and pour some more lighter fluid on. I put the turkey back on, stick a match through the grate to light the fire. Holy smokes we have a fire going now. I figure all is well so I head back inside. I go back out in 30 minutes (having learned the grill won't cook for 2 hours by itself I check earlier this time) and the turkey is charred black. Darker than midnight. Burned to a crisp. I am now steaming.

I go ahead and bring the turkey inside and cut into it. It is still FROZEN!!! How can it be so black on the outside and still frozen on the inside? THIS GRILL STINKS!!!

I cannot offer my recommendation on this grill. I was looking forward to cooking on this grill for all the positive reviews I had read, but I cannot recommend it. Either I don't know what I am doing (and I know that is not the case, ask my neighbors in the cul-de-sack) or this grill stinks. Back to the Hibachi I used in college.

If you want to put together a grill, not have charcoal included, not cook turkey because the grill does not know how, and disappoint your family, buy this grill. It will accomplish all of these tasks.

WEBER IS BAD! NUMBER NINE GRILL IN AMERICAN IS BETTER THAN THIS ONE! DON'T BUY THIS GRILL IF YOU LIKE TO EAT TASTY FOOD!

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/customer-reviews/B0006...missionDate&n=286168

This guy is a retard!

"I know barbequinq. I know smokeing. I know grilling."

There is no way he knows any of this based on his review....the man can't even light a fire properly. I feel really bad for his family as well as his neighbors for having to put up with the kind of food (i assume) he cooks. Sorry for being so rough (who ever you are) but damn!

Was it Weber's fault that he:

1. Used lighter fluid with bird on the grill
2. Went more than two hours without checking grill
3. Put frozen turkey on grill
4. Didn't use thermometer to monitor grill temp
5. Didn't use thermometer to monitor internal temp
6. Seems to have cooked it direct, as if grilling a steak

This isn't the first "idiot" review of Weber grills. There have been several over the past few years. I have to believe the recent ones are just entertaining themselves at Amazon's expense.

See this thread.

I think you are right, this can't be for real

Well...that got rid of my foul mood. WoW....if he's the BBQ wiz on his block - I'd hate to see last place

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:

Reply to eggman, June 3, 2006
Reviewer: Rayzer (North Carolina) - See all my reviews
This is in reply to eggmans review of the Weber Performer Charcoal Grill dated 02 May 2006.

First of all, I would hate to live in your neighborhood and be invited to a cookout. If you are the 3 time winning "GRANDMASTER GRILLING CHAMPION"...well, God help us all! Second; when you were at the home improvement store purchasing this grill and you saw the box the grill came in what did you think? That when you took it out there would be a ripcord to pull and it would automatically assemble itself? Or did you think that it was already fully assembled in that small of a box? If you didn't want to spend 8 hours (I can only guess why it took you that long) putting it together then you should have purchased it from a grill store and paid extra for them to assemble it. Or you could have hired the 10 year old down the street to put it together for you in an hour and a half then you would have had more time to poison your family with your Grandmaster Grilling techniques. Third; didn't you say that, "I know barbequinq. I know smokeing. I know grilling" (your words & misspellings, not mine)? If you are the "GRANDMASTER GRILLING CHAMPION" why wouldn't you already have all the charcoal you needed? Everyone I know, myself included, have an abundance of everything we need to grill/smoke at a moments notice. Did the ad or display in the store say that it came with charcoal? I'm sure that the employee at the home improvement store was thoroughly impressed with you. Fourth; you stated, "I go ahead and fill the grill up with charcoal and pour some more lighter fluid on." I don't know about your grill but mine has a warning printed in a box to the right of the igniter that reads: DANGER: Open barbeque lid before lighting. Do not use any flammable liquids such as starting fluid, gasoline (I'm sure that one was meant for you), alcohol, or any form of self lighting charcoal at any time including when manually lighting. Maybe you shouldn't be using lighter fluid, you think?! Fifth; You said, "After little more than two hours I go to check on how it is cooking. THE FIRE IS OUT! I have no idea for how long my turkey has been sitting over no heat." You relight, go back inside, then go back out in 30 minutes and it is burnt to a crisp. Did you really think that you would be pulling a turkey off the grill in 2 ½ hours and expect it to be done? And why in Gods name would you put a frozen turkey or anything else frozen on the grill?

Mark Twain once quoted, "It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt."

My warning to anyone who reads this mans review is to only do so if you need a good laugh. Do not, I repeat, do not base your decision to buy or not to buy this grill based on his review.

And my final warning is to this mans family, friends, neighbors, acquaintances, innocent bystanders or anyone that is asked to eat his cooking (or whatever you call it), RUNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!

That was good for a laugh. I was pushed to jump in on the WSM reviews because of the moronic reviews.

This sounds like the reviews of the "salted boiling water" recipe on epicurious.com. It's good for a laugh if you have time to read through the reviews.

Kenwood,

You are my new hero!

Jim

Good laughs here - this obviously isn't real. At least it got me smiling.

Ray

Perhaps some folks need to lighten up

that was a good laugh! maybe eggman should change his name to funnyman

Same guy wrote a review of the Weber Chimney - just as reasonable!